“Church Signs”
BY Clarence Odom bootodom@yahoo.com
After searching the web for some months for Church Signs and finding none I finally gave up. Viewers are welcomed and encouraged to send me their messages and comments. I will give you credit for the messages you send. Please keep the messages short as they can only be read in five seconds from the highway. May the Lord bless and use these messages for His Glory.
Salvation and Soap, We need them both
Don’t waste ammunition when you witness-Shoot to kill
Wrinkled with a burden? Come to the Church for a faith lift
When praying don’t give God instructions just report for duty
God doesn’t want a share of your life He wants controlling interest
Don’t wait for 6 strong men to take you to Church
We don’t change God’s message – it changes us
This Church is Prayer Conditioned
Warning – exposure to“ The Son” may prevent burning
Truth decay? Brush up on your Bible
Exercise daily – walk with the Lord
Compassion: hard to give away, it always keeps coming back
Nothing ruins the truth like stretching it
Give Satan an inch and he’ll be a ruler.
God doesn’t call the qualified – He qualifies the called
Read the Bible – It will scare the hell out of you
If God is your co-pilot swap seats
If anyone goes to sleep in Church, wake up the Pastor
To combat pride, remember God created the worm before man
When a Christian dies he moves out of an “old mud hut”
To get rid of criminals, stop raising them
God buries his workmen, but continues his work
The “wild life” ends when the “new birth” begins
No matter the storm, with God there’s a rainbow
Noah’s ark built by amateurs, the Titanic by professionals
Home Improvement: Use God’s instruction book
God can change a “Dirt Devil” into a “Mr. Clean”
1 Christ 2 Boards 3 Nails 4 Given = Heaven
Our CEO has a “pardon” for all
God’s “Best Seller” is about the “Best Fellow”
Knee mail gets you to outer space
Frightened? Hide is “in Our Father’s Hand”
Wise Mothers use “Dr. Spank” not “Dr. Spock”
The Bible is the book that “Reads You”
“Our Flock” stands on “The Rock”
It’s harder “to live” for the Lord than “to die” for Him
Churches will either “Evangelize” or “Fossilize”
Christians don’t die they just change addresses
To the “Baker” Christ is “the living bread”
To the “Architect” Christ is “The Chief Cornerstone”
To the “Biologist” Christ is “The Life”
To the “Doctor” Christ is the “Great Physician”
To the “Educator” Christ is the “Great Teacher”
To the “Florist” Christ is the “Rose of Sharon”
To the ‘Farmer” Christ is the “Lord of the Harvest”
To the “Geologist” Christ is the “Rock of Ages”
To the “Jurist” Christ is the “Righteous Judge”
To the “Horticulturist” Christ is the “True Vine”
To the “Philosopher” Christ is the ‘Wisdom of God”
To the “Preacher” Christ is the “Word of God”
To the “Servant” Christ is the “Good Master”
To the “Sculptor” Christ is the ‘Living Stone”
To the “Student” Christ is the “Incarnate Truth”
To the “Traveler” Christ is the “High”way
To the “Laborer” Christ is the “Giver of Rest”
To the “Sinner” Christ is the “Lamb of God”
To the “Christian” Christ is the “Redeemer and Lord”
To the “Optician” Christ is the ‘Light of the world”
To the “Editor” Christ is the “Good News”
To the “Seeker” Christ is “The Truth”
To the “Writer” the half of Christ has never been told
To the “Evolutionist” Christ is “The Missing Link”
God put “The Church” in the world
Satan tries to put “The World” in the Church
Eternity is a “Long Time” to be wrong
Best friends are like Jesus - They stick with you
The Christian life has no “Time Outs”
A “good conscience” is a “good friend”
A “Workless” Christian is a “Worthless” Christian
Man’s basic need is “Spiritual” not “Social”
To the “Deceased” Christ is the “Proper Exit”
To the “Mathematician” Christ is God’s “Plus Sign”
Christ offers a “Complete Renovation” from within
The Grave is not man’s “Final Heritage”
Jesus is the “Redeemer” - Satan is the “Schemer”
Jesus will “receive you” - Satan will “deceive you”
Jesus “saves” - Satan “slaves”
Don’t let “Gold” become your “God”
Jesus didn’t just “live & die” - He “died & lives”
Christ’s “coming” keeps us “going”
To get into heaven, “contact the owner”
Do what u can, where U R with what U have
God uses “ordinary people” for his “extraordinary plan”
“To live” without God is “to die” without hope
God’s truth has no relatives
Christians are either Bibles or Libels
If life depended on knowing the Bible How long would you live?
U can do what U want when U want 2 please God
Don’t wait till the 11th hour to repent you may die at 10:30
Bathe in “The Word” to stay clean in “The World”
Salvation is not ‘Feeling’ but ‘Faith”
In a “Tough” world keep in ‘Touch” with God
Trusting in Christ is not a gamble it’s a “Sure Thing”
Settle your accounts today; you can’t bank on tomorrow
Adoption “Better” than Abortion
Resolutions are “Made & Broken”- God’s word “Never”
Is Jesus coming again? You better believe it
Looking for a real friend? His name is “Jesus”
We don’t know “How Soon” it will be “Too Late”
“In” trouble? Our CEO can help you “Out”
“Friends” don’t let “Friends” go to hell
Made in Jesus Christ
Pray for the peace of Jer”usa”lem
Living as if there is no hereafter? You better be right!
Only 2 Religions in the world “Do” & “Done”
Make promises- make friends, keep promises- keep friends
Don’t use the “Devil’s Tools” to do the “Lord’s Work”
God is like “Bayer Aspirin” He works wonders
God is like “Coke” He’s the real thing
God is like a “Hallmark Card” he cared enough to send his very best
God is like ”Tide” he gets out stains others leave behind
God is like “General Electric” he brings good things to life
God is like “ Alka-Seltzer” oh what a relief he is
God is like “Scotch Tape” you can’t see him but he’s there
God is like “Delta” he’s ready when you are
God is like “All-State” you’re in good hands with him
God is like “VO-5” he holds through all kinds of weather
God is like “Dial Soap” don’t you wish everybody knew him?
God is like a “Keepsake” guaranteed to last forever
God is like the “Marines” he can use a few good men
God is like “Perry Mason” he never loses a case
God is like a “Rocket Scientist” he can take you into outer space
God is like a “Carpenter” He swings big doors on little hinges
God is like “Double-Mint Gum” he can double your pleasure
Finding “God” is more exciting than finding “Waldo”
“Godly Fathers” are now an “Endangered Species”
Faith, Hope & Charity live here
We are committed to “Prayer” not “Protest”
The Sailor’s Hymn: “We have an Anchor”
The Soldier’s Hymn: “Victory in Jesus”
The Florist’s Hymn: “The Lilly of the Valley”
The Dentist’s Hymn: “Crown Him with many Crowns”
The Theologian’s Hymn: “It is no Secret what God can do”
The Weatherman’s Hymn: “There shall be Showers of Blessing”
The Astronaut’s Hymn: “This World is not my Home”
The General’s Hymn: “All hail the power of Jesus name”
The Dying Christian’s Hymn: “Hallelujah, We shall rise”
The Undertaker’s Hymn: “Now the day is over”
The Chiropractic’s Hymn: “He touched me”
The Architect’s Hymn: “The Church’s one foundation”
The Gofer’s Hymn: “There is a green hill far away”
The Realtor’s Hymn: “Ive got a mansion just over the hilltop”
The Judge’s Hymn: “There’s a great day coming”
The Newly Wed Hymn: “Oh Love that will not let me go”
The Get-Rich Hymn: “Count your many Blessings”
The Power Company Hymn: “Send the Light”
The Optometrist’s Hymn: “Open my eyes that I may see”
The Politician’s Hymn: “Standing on the promises”
The Surgeon’s Hymn: “He Lives”
The Missionary’s Hymn: “We’ve a Story to tell to the Nations”
The Pest-Control Hymn: “No, not one!”
The Winning Coach’s Hymn: “It took a Miracle”
The Salesman’s Hymn: “Why do you wait?”
The Procrastinator’s Hymn: “Some Golden Daybreak”
The Newscaster’s Hymn: “I love to tell the story”
The Lawyer’s Hymn: “No other plea”
The Botanist’s Hymn: “Where the roses never fade”
The Economist’s Hymn: “It pays to serve Jesus”
The Forecaster’s Hymn: “I know who holds tomorrow”
The Backslider’s Hymn: “I shall not be moved”
The 45 MPH Hymn: “God will take care of you”
The 95 MPH Hymn: “Lord I’m coming home”
The Interior Decorator’s Hymn: “Something Beautiful”
The Adversity Hymn: “Teach Me to Pray, Lord”
The Choir Director’s Hymn: “O for a Thousand Tongues to Sing”
The Kindergarten Teacher’s Hymn: “Blessed Quietness”
The Barber’s Hymn: “ Leave it there”
The Student’s Hymn: “ I Found the Answer”
The House Painter’s Hymn: “ Brighten the Corner where you are”
The Voter’s Hymn: “ I’d rather have Jesus”
The Sweepstakes Winner’s Hymn:
“ Wait a little longer Jesus”
The Teacher’s Hymn: “Jesus never fails”
Christ can change a “Tumbleweed” into An “Oak”
God is still the God of a “Second Chance”
Sin will take you “Further” than you want to “go”
Sin will “Keep” you longer than you want to “Stay”
Sin will “Cost” you more than you want to “Pay”
Sin will bring “Consequences” you won’t like”
“The Internet” connects with the world “The Intercessor” to God.
Over 100,000 hearts “stop beating” every day.
A “Black” heart washed it in the “Red” blood of Christ makes it “white” as snow.
Does your travel plans include heaven?
The greatest sin -“Pride”
The greatest loss – “Heaven”
The greatest hope – “The Rapture of the Church”
The most effective word – “Prayer”
The saddest words – “No Hope”
The greatest hindrance – “Fear”
The greatest word – “Love”
The sweetest words – “I Forgive”
The best words – “Not Guilty”
The most accepted words - “I’m Sorry”
Your name’s on God’s invitation list
Jesus Christ: “The dragon slayer”
Jesus Christ: “The master carpenter”
Jesus Christ: “ The first astronaut”
Jesus – Others – Ourselves
Forbidden fruit spoils quickly
Heaven: R U Going?
Heaven: No “good-byes” there
Heaven: “Where the Roses never fade”
Heaven: A “Promised Place” by the “Promise Keeper”
Heaven: A “No Smoking” zone
Heaven: “No funerals allowed”
Heaven: You “Better” believe it
Heaven: Your passport “The New Birth”
Heaven: “Is Forever”
Heaven: “Grace” takes and keeps you there
Heaven: “U R” on the invitation list
Heaven: Our “CEO” is in charge
Heaven: Don’t miss it for “the world”
Heaven: God’s “Holy-of Holies”
Heaven: Make inquiry now!
Heaven: “Repentant Sinners Welcomed”
Heaven: “Angelic Neighbors”
Heaven: It’s not for everyone!
Heaven: Drink from the fountain of youth!
God “ Does not know” a sinner he doesn’t love.
God “ Does not know” a sinner he won’t save.
God “ Does not know” a sin that he
Doesn’t hate.
God “ Does not remember” a sin that he has forgiven.
God “can” change a Dirt Devil into a Mr. Clean
God “ can” forgive your past and change your future.
God “knows” your past, present and future.
God “can” change an alcoholic into an abstainer.
God “Can” change a burden into a blessing.
God “can” change a rounder into a square.
God “can” change liars into choirs
God “can” change trials into triumphs.
God “can” turn the selfish into the selfless.
If God went on “Vacation” the sun would stop shining.
If God went on “Vacation” the birds would stop singing.
If God went on “Vacation” the flowers would stop blooming.
If God went on “Vacation” the rain would stop falling.
If God went on “Vacation” The wind would stop blowing.
If God went on “Vacation” you would Lose your job.
If God went on “Vacation” you would lose your health.
If God went on “Vacation” you would lose your wealth.
If God went on ‘Vacation” The terrorists would triumph.
If God went on “Vacation” the devil would have a heyday.
If God went on “Vacation” crime would multiply.
If God went on “Vacation” the earth would stop rotating.
If God went on “Vacation” our hearts would stop beating.
If God went on “Vacation” prayers would go unanswered.
If God went on “Vacation” the stars would stop shining.
If God went on “Vacation” the seasons would not change
In Genesis, Jesus is the “seed of the woman”.
In Exodus, Jesus is the “Passover lamb”.
In Leviticus, Jesus is “ The Scapegoat”
In Numbers, Jesus is “ The City of Refuse”
In Deuteronomy, Jesus is “The Rock”
In Joshua, Jesus is “ Captain of the Lord’s Host”
In Judges, Jesus is “The Righteous Judge”
In Ruth, Jesus is “Our Kinsman Redeemer”
In 1st & 2nd Samuel, Jesus is our “Trusted Prophet”
In Kings & Chronicles, Jesus is “Our
Reigning King”
In Ezra, Jesus is “ Our Faithful Scribe”
In Nehemiah, Jesus is “Re-builder of Broken Things”
In Ester, Jesus is “Our Mordecai at the Gate”
In Job, Jesus is “Our Living Redeemer”
In Psalms, Jesus is “The Good Shepherd”
In Proverbs & Ecclesiastes, Jesus is “Our Wisdom”
In Song of Solomon , Jesus is “Our Bridegroom”
In Isaiah, Jesus is “Our Sacrificial Lamb”
In Jeremiah & Lamentations, Jesus is ‘Our Weeping Prophet”
In Ezekiel, Jesus is “The Water of Life”
In Daniel, Jesus is “The 4th. Man In the Fire”
In Hosea, Jesus is “The Faithful Lover”
In Joel, Jesus “Baptizes with the Holy Spirit”
In Amos, Jesus is “Our Burden Bearer”
In Obadiah, Jesus is “Our Saviour”
Jonah, Jesus is “Our Foreign Missionary”
In Micah , Jesus is the ”Babe of Bethlehem”
In Nahum, Jesus is “Our Avenger”
In Habakkuk, Jesus is “Our Watchman”
In Zephaniah, Jesus is the “Lord Mighty to Save”
In Haggai, Jesus is “The Restorer of our Lost Heritage”
In Zechariah, Jesus is “Our Fountain”
In Malachi, Jesus is “The Son of Righteousness”
In Matthew, Jesus is “The Son of God”
In Mark, Jesus is “The Miracle Worker’
In Luke, Jesus is “The Son of Man”
In John, Jesus is “The Door”
In Acts, Jesus is “The shining light to Paul”
In Romans, Jesus is “Our Justifier”
In 1 Corinthians, Jesus is “Our Resurrection”
In 2nd Corinthians, Jesus is “Our Righteousness”
In Galatians, Jesus “Redeems us from the Law”
In Ephesians, Jesus is “Our Unsearchable Riches”
In Philippians, Jesus “Supplies our every Need”
In Colossians, Jesus is “ The Fullness of the Godhead Bodily”
In 1st & 2nd Thessalonians, Jesus is “Our Coming King”
In 1st & 2nd Timothy, Jesus is “Our Mediator “
In Titus, Jesus is “Our Blessed Hope”
In Philemon, Jesus is “ A Friend that sticks closer than a Brother”
In Hebrews, Jesus is “Our High-Priest”
In James, Jesus is “The Lord that Heals”
In 1st & 2nd Peter, Jesus is “The Chief Shepherd”
In 1st, 2nd &3rd John, Jesus “Is the Tenderness of Love”
In Jude, Jesus is “The Lord coming with 10,000 Saints”
In Revelation, Jesus is “The Lion & The Lamb”
Eternity: A “Long Time” to ponder
Eternity: Where “decisions can’t be reversed”
Eternity: Where “Time” doesn’t matter
Eternity: Where “Fame” doesn’t matter
Eternity: Where “Social Status” doesn’t matter
Eternity: Where “Stocks and Bonds” doesn’t matter
Eternity: Where “Family Heritage” doesn’t matter
Eternity: Where “Church Membership” doesn’t matter
Eternity: Where the “New-Birth” does matter
When no one else cares “He Cares”
When no one else helps “He Helps”
When on one else hears “He Hears”
When no on else understands “He Understands”
When no one else visits “He Visits”
When no one else feels ‘He Feels”
When no one else sees “He Sees”
When no one else loves “He Loves”
When no one else weeps “He Weeps”
When no one else can heal “He Heals”
The Bible: “The Book without Error”
The Bible: “The Book that Reads You”
The Bible: “The Book that Speaks to You”
The Bible: “The Book that Knows You”
The Bible: “The Book that Changes You”
The Bible: “The Book that Meets Your Needs”
The Bible: “The Book that Makes You Wise”
The Bible: “The Book that Makes you Safe”
The Bible: “The Book that Makes You Holy”
The Bible: “The Book that makes You Sure”
The Bible: “The Book that is a Weapon”
The Bible: “The Book that is a Shield”
The Bible: “The Book that contains the Mind of God”
The Bible: “The Book that contains the State of Man”
The Bible: “The Book without Error”
The Bible: “The Book that Satan Hates”
The Bible: “The Book that Saints Love”
The Bible: “The Book used at Weddings”
The Bible: “The Book used at Funerals”
The Bible: “The Book used at Courthouses”
The Bible: “The Book that will meet you at the Judgment”/>
The Gospel: Can make a Drunkard Sober
The Gospel: Can make a Thief Honest
The Gospel: Can make a Harlot Pure
The Gospel: Can make an Adulator Faithful
The Gospel: Can make a Liar Trustworthy
The Gospel: Can make a Murderer Repentant
The Gospel: Can Make Drug Addict Clean
The Gospel: Can make a Blasphemer a Worshiper
The Gospel: Can change a Sinner into a Saint
Believers never walk alone
God was with Enoch when he was translated to heaven